Building Self-Esteem Il

Welcome.
The second way by which our self-esteem can be built is by consciously moving away from what we consider as painful into what we consider as pleasure. Sigmund Freud referred to this as the "pleasure principle". It has been observed that there is nothing good or bad but thinking made it so. Therefore it is important we evaluate and define what we consider pain or pleasure. Pleasure is what brings comfort or happiness to you while pain is discomfort.
If you walk with four wealthy friends, you will become the fifth wealthy man--- Jim Rohn. Do not be deceived: evil communication corrupts good manners--- Bible (1 Cor. 15:33). All these wise sayings which we can call relationship laws do one thing: influence the way an individual thinks, his perspective or approach to life. Everything a man does beginning at childhood to any stage at adulthood such as socialization, eating habits, toilet training, etc. are all driven by his feelings about what he considered as good and pleasurable away from what he sees as painful or bad.
What do we consider pleasurable? Here is a list of some:
1. What makes us win the love and affection of others;
2. What makes us win the respect of others;
3. What gives us freedom;
4. What gives us peace;
5. What gives us satisfaction;
6. What gives us power or authority;
7. What makes us happy etc.
Therefore, much of what we do in life, from childhood onward, is done either to get love or to compensate for the lack of love--- Brian Tracey. This may be the reason why stealing is rare among the Eskimos. If any of them is caught stealing, others merely laugh at him whenever fellow eskimo sees him or her.
Nuggets for building self-esteem:
a) Evaluate how you used your 24 hours for the past three days;
b) Identify activities that lead nowhere but consumed time;
c) Take note of task in these hours under consideration that helped you achieve your goals;
d) Do more of the activities highlighted in (c) above and less of (b);
e) List the number of friends you have;
f) Identify those who when you are around them motivate you into playing games all-day, or go to movies all-day, or some fun-oriented activities which do not add to your long term goal or happiness;
g) Review your goals;
h) List people who have already achieve them;
i) Replace or substitute the list in (f) above with the list in (h) above;
j) Digest good books written by philosophers, psychotherapists, psychologists, motivation speakers, etc. Good books are those which support or talk about how you can move from where you are to where you want to be;
k) Good magazines such as https//: www.time.com, https//: www.hbr.com, https://www.economist.com/ blog such as https//: www.blogger.com, https//: www.wordpress.com etc.
---Since in the desire for happiness it is not the form (of conformity to law) that is decisive, but simply the matter, namely whether I am to expect pleasure in following the law and how much--- Immanuel Kant.
Till next time when we shall be reading a new episode, don't forget to always be the best version of yourself.
Thank you.

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